SIDDHA

many times it is not easy for us to experience suffering as we make the choices in our life for ease or for hardship. taking the difficult road is not easy. to raise one’s higher self to work with spirit is not an easy thing to do. all is part of our transformation. it is messy and challenging.

many wonderful souls have have gone through such a situation and how wonderful it is to know someone else has gone or is going through it too, like my sister… i’m not even half of her strenght. her choice of challenges are too extreme for me and i admired her for that! she brings inspiration and comfort to me. this is how the Divine Presence are showing as the frailty of the human form. that’s why in my desperate times, i always wanted to leave this body and stay in the astral realms… for good

in my struggle of daily life, i keep on holding to my sense of truth and remembering that the Divine Presence are behind me… they may have triggered it, and they did it for a reason… which i wish i know.

may i be strong in my challenges,

may fire and light hold my pain.

and may the Mother of the Light

guide me…

bakit sa gitna ng pag-subok

ay dumarating sa puntong

hindi mo na kayang

tignan ang pagdating nito,

at gusto mo na lamang

ipikit ang iyong mga mata,

habang umaasang may

katapusan din ang lahat.

how funny that i found myself writing on my pc late this night…
i wanted to tell her how much i miss her ever-present smile, her courage, her strenght, her weakness and her unconditional love.

her presence is deeply buried in my consciousness, my space was filled with her memories and still such a long way to go in my life.

i felt so guilty that i never gave back the love and time which she unselfishly gave to me…i owe my mom and dad a lot for being what i am now. knowing that i can’t bring back the lost time, it pained me more.

now i long for another moment in their presence. how i’d love them given the chance, how i will cherish each moment, were i have those times again.

i still remember her last moment before her sacred journey, i was holding the space for her, it was swift and brief. no clinging. no grasping. she simply let go.

she taught me something profound at that moment, she took away my fears with her passing. she showed me a new door behind the veil. when you get past the fear we connect with love and with our own divinity and oneness to the Creator.

mom, you know the greater life is ahead…

…i lovingly let go of you as you let go of me,

for we know, we shall meet again in the fieds of peace.

may the Mother of the Light protect your way.

mom, i love you and happy mother’s day!